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List-Subscribe: List-Digest: List-Unsubscribe: Message-Id: 6Traits Digest #53 - Thursday, August 12, 1999 Convention Rubrics by "Paul Nixon" Example of Organization by "Paul Nixon" ****Conventions #4 - 8/12/99 - Assignment **** by "Paul Nixon" ***Conventions - Example #1 - 8/12/99*** by "Paul Nixon" ***Conventions - Example #2 - 8/12/99*** by "Paul Nixon" ***Conventions - Example #3 - 8/12/99*** by "Paul Nixon" Editing Marks by "Paul Nixon" The English Language by Re: School starts by "Julia Poor" ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Subject: Convention Rubrics From: Paul Nixon Date: Thu, 12 Aug 1999 15:44:14 -0700 Convention Rubrics are up on the web site. Take a look at the standard rubric and analyze it. My computer should, with any luck, be running = again in an hour or two (it keeps telling us the modem is connected to another program, which it isn't, so Paul has taken it to a fix it man - thank heavens for archives! I read yesterday's messages, and subbed my husband to the list!) - much faster and with lots of HD space, so I'll put it in = an e-mail form also. I do apologize for this disruption in this week's trait - thank goodness = it is one we all know much too well. BTW, I heard in language arts adoption committee today about someone setting up grading using the 6 traits - report card reporting to parents, really. Most of the things under language arts on our report card, redone just 2-3 years ago, concern conventions - about 80% - and conventions should only account for about 18% of a writing grade. So there's a hint for those who want to have the rubrics help them with grading - no trait should contribute more than about 15-18% of the grade. The rubric evaluates the child's progress on the continuum. (Sound familiar?) In grading, think about what expectations you have for = students at your grade level. If you expect them to be on level 2 in 2nd grade, = for instance, and they *are* on level 2, maybe that constitutes the C grade. Students functioning on level 3 might be a B. On the other hand, if you expect a 5th grade student to be on level 4 and they are on level 2, I wouldn't want to give them a D. Many things have = to go into the writing grade, and it's more subjective than most grades. These are tough choices that I'm sure we'll discuss more as the end of the first grading period approaches, but we should be thinking about them now. If you have any thoughts on this, throw them into the pot. =3D) Call = this the brainstorming time, and we won't evaluate your responses. =3D) We'll just consider all the points that come in for discussion, and see if we = can reach a concensus which will be helpful to all of us, or somewhat helpful to all of us. http://6Traits.CyberSpaces.net/ Susan Nixon 2nd Grade Phoenix, AZ ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Subject: Example of Organization From: Paul Nixon Date: Thu, 12 Aug 1999 15:48:45 -0700 Deb, and everyone, This example from Winnie the Pooh is a *perfect* example of misuse of conventions to create an effect - level 6 on the rubric. Thanks for thinking of this one, Deb. Susan Nixon 2nd Grade Phoenix, AZ ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Subject: ****Conventions #4 - 8/12/99 - Assignment **** From: Paul Nixon Date: Thu, 12 Aug 1999 16:25:16 -0700 Level 1 - Not Yet The writing lacks coherence; organization seems haphazard and disjointed. Even after rereading, the reader remains confused. The writing is characterized by: *a lack of effective sequencing. *a failure to provide an identifiable beginning, body, and/or ending. *a lack of transitions. *pacing that is consistently awkward; the reader feels either mired down in trivia or rushed along too rapidly. *a lack of organization which ultimately obscures or distorts the main point. Level 2 - Emerging The writing lacks a clear organizational structure. An occasional organizational device is discernible; however, the writing is either difficult to follow and the reader has to reread substantial portions, or the piece is simply too short to demonstrate organizational skills. The writing is characterized by: *some attempts at sequencing, but the order of the relationship among ideas is frequently unclear. *a missing or extremely undeveloped beginning, body, and/or ending. *a lack of transitions, or when present, ineffective or overused transitions. *a lack of an effective organizational structure. *details that seem to be randomly placed,leaving the reader frequently confused. *attempts organization, but the reader has to figure it out. Level - 3 - Developing *An attempt has been made to organize the writing; however, the overall structure is inconsistent or skeletal. The writing is characterized by: *attempts at sequencing, but the order or the relationship among ideas = may occasionally be unclear. *a beginning and an ending which, although present, are either = undeveloped or too obvious (e.g., "My topic is...", "These are all the reasons that...."). *transitions that sometimes work. The same few transitional devices = (e.g., coordinating conjunctions, numbering, etc.) may be overused. *a structure that is skeletal or too rigid. *placement of details that may not always be effective. *organization which lapses in some places, but helps the reader in = others. Level - 4 - Competent Organization is clear and coherent. Order and structure are present, but may seem formulaic. The writing is characterized by: *clear sequencing. *an organization that may be predictable. *a recognizable, developed beginning that may not be particularly = inviting; *a developed conclusion that may lack subtlety. *a body that is easy to follow with details that fit where placed. *transitions that may be stilted or formulaic. *organization which helps the reader, despite some weaknesses. Level -5 - Experienced The organization enhances the central idea(s) and its development. The order and structure are strong and move the reader through the text. The writing is characterized by: *effective sequencing; the organizational structure fits the topic, and the writing is easy to follow. *an inviting beginning that draws the reader in and a satisfying sense of resolution or closure. *smooth, effective transitions among all elements (sentences, paragraphs, ideas). *details that fit where placed. Level 6 - WOW! The organization enhances the central idea(s) and its development. The order and structure are compelling and move the reader through the text easily. The writing is characterized by: *effective, perhaps creative, sequencing; the organizational structure fits the topic, and the writing is easy to follow. *a strong, inviting beginning that draws the reader in and a strong, satisfying sense of resolution or closure. *smooth, effective transitions among all elements (sentences, paragraphs, ideas). *details that fit where placed Assignment: Go over the rubric. Underline parts that define each level, and circle = the words and phrases which separate one level from another. Mail your evaluation to the list. Susan Nixon 2nd Grade Phoenix, AZ ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Subject: ***Conventions - Example #1 - 8/12/99*** From: Paul Nixon Date: Thu, 12 Aug 1999 16:44:28 -0700 Since grade level expectations are important on this one trait, I'll tell you this fulfilled an 8th grade persuasive writing assignment. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Everything in the world has to have food may it be good food or junk food. Junck food is one of the more populare food. Most people like soda pops, hambriger, popcorn, shakes itc. Some of the places you can get these at = is at 7 eleven stores, Mcdonalds, Dariy Queen etc. Some Health food nut say that you will get fat if you eat hamburgere. You will but if you just at health food al the time, your body will get to = many vitimens and you can die. Health food is a food that will give your vitemans and cleans out your iners. You need your vitemens if you want to stay healthy. If you don't get enought food you whont get your vitemens. Eny whay you nead junk food to get your adrental gland working., Junk = food like hamburger is a good food. some people say htat it is bad for you or is it. I don't think it is so bad for you because you get tomatos, lettice, musterd, relish and meat. Shakes. shakes are made out of milk, ice and artivial flaver and suger. Some people say that fried chiken is good for you but is it. The chiken = is fried in nothing but oil. If you eat to much of the skin you will get = sike but I like fried chiken. It is one of my favorit food so I don't care = what eny one thinkes. If it is food it is food. If you just had a candy bare out in the desert would you just throw it a way hec no. If you were out on the dessert you would take one bite of it and keep it in your mouth for days. If you don't eat eny food you will die in 63 days of what is called starvation. starvaison ocures wen you don't get enought food and you = don't get eny oxegen to your bones. (Not cut short - that's the end.) Remember, we aren't evaluating voice on this one. =3D) Susan ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Subject: ***Conventions - Example #2 - 8/12/99*** From: Paul Nixon Date: Thu, 12 Aug 1999 16:46:27 -0700 No, I didn't pick this one because it's about quilts. =3D) This is from = the 5th grade. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> My Quilt I will never forget my grandmother. The quilt she gave me helps me to remember her. The quilt was given to me when I was born. Everytime a grandchild is born my grandma makes him (or her) a quilt. My quilt has pictures of Jack-in-the-boxes, rabbits, teddy bears, ponies, and patches of material. At night when I'm in bed my quilt reminds me of my grandma's smile, house, and all the little things about her. Sometimes it reminds me of her funeral and that usually makes me cry. But then I remember how sick she was and I know that she's with my grandpa, which is something he's been wanting to do for a long time. When I'm sad, angry, or sometimes when I'm a little scared, I go into my room and lay down on my quilt and I make up stories about the pictures on my quilt, or remember the good times we had with my grandma. I try to imagine what she's doing in heaven. I bet she's watching a baseball game just like she always did! The End ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Subject: ***Conventions - Example #3 - 8/12/99*** From: Paul Nixon Date: Thu, 12 Aug 1999 16:51:04 -0700 This is also 5th grade work. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> My Bike When I got my first bike in 1987, I thought it would be hord becaues it = was bigger thin me the pilters are smaller thin my feet. so I sead dad I can not rid this bike. The bike is bigger the pilters are smaller but my dad sead Just try. But dad the bike bike is bigger thin me and pilter are smaller. so how = can I if it's like that. Just try son. Dad it sas 4 wheels why dosen't have = 2 wheels not 4. Son you Just a beginer your sister, mom, and me starded = like that whit 4 wheels. Ok. I will try, but it will not work. I till y. So It did so I sead see I toal-y. It would work but no you sead that it = would not work. Son I know I know I know son Were are you son I'm behid you dad is it time to go now is it dad dad yes son is it tlme to come in yes son. The 3nd ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Subject: Editing Marks From: Paul Nixon Date: Thu, 12 Aug 1999 16:57:07 -0700 Does your district have a standard set of editing marks which everyone teaches? Our trainers suggested that districts need to have such a set. Primary students wouldn't learn all of them, but the ones they did learn would be the same as those taught to intermediate, to junior high, and to high school students. If your district does have such a set, you might share with the list what those marks are and how they are used. If your district does not, perhaps a discussion on this list about the various possibilities will help you make a list to present to them. If we expect students to write at a certain level, we need to make sure = all students in the district are receiving the same instruction and do not = have to relearn information. In the past, our district did not have a standard. We used whatever the language arts series suggested. I always told my students that editing marks were for their own personal use, and that whatever they used, if it helped them to remember changes they wanted to make, would be fine. However, as students get older and leave high school for college or to go into the work force, it may be expected that certain standard marks will = be understood by all. Please share with us what you do. Susan Nixon 2nd Grade Phoenix, AZ ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Subject: The English Language From: PRIPAY@aol.com Date: Thu, 12 Aug 1999 20:43:38 EDT Thought this was cute. Enjoy!! Tracy Subject: FW: On English..... Lets face it English is a strange language. There is no egg in the eggplant No ham in the hamburger And neither pine nor apple in the = pineapple. English muffins were not invented in England. French fries were not = invented in France. We sometimes take English for granted. But if we examine its paradoxes we find that quicksand takes you down slowly Boxing rings are square And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. If writers write, how come fingers don't fing. If the plural of tooth is teeth. Shouldn't the plural of phone booth = be phone beeth. If the teacher taught, Why didn't the preacher praught. If a vegetarian eats vegetables What the heck does a humanitarian = eat!? Why do people recite at a play Yet play at a recital? Park on = driveways and Drive on parkways. How can the weather be as hot as hell on one day and as cold as hell = on another. You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language where a house = can burn up as it burns down and in which you fill in a form by filling it out = and a bell is only heard once it goes! Why do they call buildings buildings, when they're already finished? Shouldn't they be called builts? Why are they called apartments, when they're all stuck together? Why do sour cream have an expiry date? The light went out, but where to? Why do banks charge you a "non-sufficient funds fee" on money they already know you don't have? Why do people go to Burger King and Order a Double Whopper with a = Large French Fries and insist on getting a Diet Coke? Why is a carrot more orange than an orange? When two airplanes almost collide why do they call it a near miss? It sounds like a near hit to me!! How come abbreviated is such a long word? Why are there 5 syllables in the word "monosyllabic"? How do "Keep off the grass" signs get where they are? Why do scientists call it research when they are actually looking for something new? English was invented by people, not computers And it reflects the creativity of the human race (Which of course isn't a race at all) That is why When the stars are out they are visible But when the = lights are out they are invisible And why it is that when I wind up my watch It starts But when I wind up this poem It ends. ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Subject: Re: School starts From: "Julia Poor" Date: Thu, 12 Aug 1999 21:29:59 -0500 School starts tomorrow, I haven't had much time to do the mail ring. I'll keep the e-mails and get with it as soon as possible, even if the course has ended, I can still benefit. This has been a very valuable and rewarding course. Thanks to Susan and everyone that wrote! Julia Poor Third Grade Indiana jpoor@tctc.com ---------------------------------------------------------------------- End of 6Traits Digest -- To unsubscribe, send any message at all to: 6Traits-off@. Archive of past digests is at: